Tonight was a good night. We went out for sushi, talked about various things sitting on the roof top of a nice hotel in Monrovia. It was one of the ‘oases’, that we visit to recharge. The prices are holy shit. $8-10 for a 3(!) piece sushi, but it’s good. I was eating my salmon sashimi and couldn’t get out of my mind the invasive image of the ‘Catwoman’ by Halle Berry eating sushi on her date. Remember that moment? I scoured through the internet to find a video of that moment, but found none. Instead, I came across this video of Halle Berry accepting the Razzie for the “Catwoman”.

I realized, that all of us, every one of us must watch this video. Especially writers. The space between writer’s left and right ear is an enigma. Creatures and worlds that inhabit it are too weird for comprehension. Recently I made a series of  posts about movies and TV shows that could not possibly fail, but failed anyway (e.g., “Jupiter Ascends”, “The X-Files” new min-series).

This video also brought home the yesterday’s account of me receiving a decisive ‘thumbs down’ on something I’ve written, from a person, who normally at least ‘OKs’ everything. Maybe I did not expect it. Maybe I was defensive, thinking: “You just don’t get it!”. One way or another, it was a thorn in my evening.

However, this morning, I woke up and saw with a great deal of clarity, that at the end of the day, “I am the captain of my soul”. I owe  it to myself to write what I think is good or fun, especially when it is about humor. Everyone has their own brand of humor, everyone has their preferences in entertainment, and I’d be the biggest fool to try pleasing everyone. I need to stay true to myself. Certainly, taking good technical advice is important. Grammar, prepositions, articles and word choice are important. But it is not more important that the story I have. I believe, that with enough effort, story will find a way.

So cheers to us all, writers and creators of alternate realities. Stay true to yourselves. Stop worrying about selling your books, and worry if you are personally excited reading your own writing. Incidentally, my writing that received criticism, made me personally laugh, and balancing the two, I emerged from this experience more confident in who I am. I am who I am.  I am not what the mainstream consumer wants, or what an eclectic consumer desires. I am my own blend of a human being, and I better remain this way, otherwise I will be swallowed by the ocean of conventional voices.

Have a good evening, all of you out there!

E.M.